Former President Obama confesses to Wiretapping Donald Trump in the lead up to the... more »

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Editor: Joe Humpay

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March 08, 2017


- Are you asking, did I wiretap Donald Trump?
Of course, I did it.
I did it throughout the election process,
and I did it again before leaving the White House.
Yep, I love wiretaps.
They're really easy to do.
Donald Trump is not alone.
I wiretapped everybody.
Now that I'm finished being president,
I'm going to start a wiretap business.
Hold up. Hold up.
I love wires.
I'm serious, listen up.
At the front end, I gotta tell you
I'm a huge fan of The Wire.
I'm gonna repeat that.
I love the HBO show, The Wire,
and during my administration, each night,
we would watch the HBO show, The Wire.
Omar's, by the way, my favorite character.
And then, I showed Michelle how to wiretap phone calls.
Yes, yes we can.
Michelle never cared about anything I cared about.
I should point out, by the way,
most nights I fall asleep dreaming about wires
and the very beautiful Donald Trump
and how he was right
about me, Obama, this whole time.
And then, I would wake up in the next morning
and try to confiscate everybody's guns.