On this episode of Good God!, God is joined by his special guest Moses and the two... more »
Published April 16, 2017 180k views More Info »
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191 Funny Votes
110 Die Votes
180,546 Views
Published: April 16, 2017
Transcript

->Hello and welcome to Good God with God,Hi, it's me, it's Moses, how you doing?Did you ever see the movie 10 commandments that came out?Yeah I saw it, I saw it, it was ridiculous.Not at all.Yeah, things get weird when you're retelling themYeah like when you were born you were likeNot a basket, cardboard box on the Mississippi,Yep, and then you floated across--All the way across--Yeah.The Atlantic ocean, through the MediterranianYep, how old where you by the time16 years old.Yeah you were a teen.I was masturbating by the time I got there.Were you masturbating in that box?I had to, you know.Well I mean, yeah, what else are you gonna do in a box?That's right.But remember in the movie, remember they wentFirst of all it wasn't a staff, let's get this right,It was a little twig.It was a little friend, you know,Like kind of a salamander like little creature?It was more cute than scary.Yeah.That was the problem, most of the plaguesYeah, that's on me, I'm really not goodYou know, the first one was you gotta getYou don't like that one?What about the second one, no whistling,I, okay.Then you did the one where it rained every other second.Yeah.It rained, stopped, rained, stopped, rained, stopped.I don't even know how I feel about that oneI was just like God, you son of a.Throughout the whole testament, it's also meYou're saying you made mistakes?Dude, I owe Jobe a big one.Oh no.Yeah, I was a bowl in a China shop,Oh my God.That was a communication problem because.Excuse me?It wasn't a worldwide flood,There was no worldwide flood?No it was just, just like a local.I gotta be honest God, you know why I'm here.What?I didn't say me, that's coming outI'm just saying like what's the alternative?I would, I would but let's not even talk about that,If you were God, what would you do Moses?Everyone's hot, that is part of my campaign promise.Are you running for God right now?So hot, a ten, beautiful curves, great facesWhy do you wanna make hot kids?Plus there's a Moses day.There's already passover, everyone celebrates you then.It's not enough.Everyone watches 10 commandments, it's your movie.God took us out in Egypt, God,Ah man.Gimme a break.Well that's all the time we haveYou killer.I'm not, it's just the way it works man.Killing off the beautiful giant panda too.Hey, look.I know, it's your show.The giant panda, I made it, I love it, check it out,

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