Halal In The Family: Spies Like Us
- April 09, 2015
- 53k Views
Aasif Mandvi as Aasif Qu’osby
Sakina Jaffrey as Fatima Qu’osby
Shoba Narayanan as Whitney Qu’osby
Nicky Maindiratta as Bobby Qu’osby
Aasif Mandvi & Miles Kahn
Chan D. Booth
Aasif Mandvi & Miles Kahn
Chris G. Eleftheriades
Mik Moore & Miriam Fogelson
Chris & Amanda Wade
Camera Assistant/Media Mgr
First Assistant Director
Second Assistant Director
Boom Operator/Sound Utility
Best Boy Electric
Production Designer’s Assistant
Joanna “JoJo” Rodriguez
Theme Song Co Produced and Mixed by
Post Audio and Film Mix by
Greg Arnold for nofat::creative
BWR Public Relations
Stuart Gelwarg & Nicholas Famularo
Altman, Greenfield and Selvaggi
Joshua Sandler & Bianca Grimshaw
Gray Krauss Stratford Sandler Des Rochers LLP
“Just an Ordinary Family”
Ken Gold & Lillian LaSalle
Miles Kahn & David Javerbaum
Matthew Loren Cohen, Miles Kahn & David Hill
Mohammad Ali Shan Javid
Special Thanks to:
Mohammad Ali Shan Javid
We Also Wish to Thank:
Bend the Arc: A Jewish Partnership for Justice
The Brennan Center
The Daily Show with Jon Stewart
Institute for Social Policy and Understanding
Jews for Racial and Economic Justice (JFREJ)
MTV’s Look Different Campaign
Shoulder to Shoulder
Halal in the Family was made possible with the incredibly
generous support of these phenomenal organizations:
Center for New Community
ACCESS / National Network for Arab American Communities
Southern Asian Americans Leading Together (SAALT)
Ford Foundation, Civil and Human Rights Unit
Doris Duke Foundation for Islamic Art’s Building Bridges Program
And the Nearly 500 Awesome People Who Donated on Indiegogo
April 09, 2015
We're just an ordinary family,
living in your town (but don't worry)
We like monster trucks and football, even though we're brown (we hate curry)
So welcome to our clan
We promise there's no plan
To change the way you live or how you pray
Because we're just here to obey
(Male Voice): Your various laws, and local ordinances
(Another Male Voice): What are you doing? We're not that kind of Muslims.
Nicky Maindiratta: In conclusion, therefore, I-I think I would make
a good class president because I can do things...
and because I'm an American Muslim.
Was it good?
Aasif Mandvi: Well, it is a very good first draft.
Sakina Jaffrey: And you said all the words.
Shoba Narayanan: Are you trying to win by boring everyone to death so
no one can vote for anyone else?
> Whitney Habib Qu'osby.
> Oh, she's right. It's no good. I just get so nervous, you know?
> Just speak from your heart.
> Exactly just downplay the Muslimy thing.
> He actually has a Muslim birth certificate, and white
people are obsessed with finding those things.
> Bobby just be yourself.
> Oh, I don't know.
> Maybe we should call Tariq.
> We don't need to call your cousin.
> He is a pro at this stuff.
> Look, I got an idea.
What this kid needs is a little pizzazz.
> Last time you said that you were arrested for sneaking an eagle into the
statue of liberty.
> And in my defense that would've made a great family holiday card.
Come on Bobby, lets make history.
> Fatima, we got this election in the bag. Check out this banner.
> What have you done?
> What have I done? What has Wendy done?
Wendy is an image consultant, and she has worked on some very high profile campaigns,
some of which she hasn't lost.
> Mrs. Q, Bobby is a natural.
> What is this supposed to mean, evil doers?
> Well would've you wanted to have gone to school with bunch of evil doers?
> Well no, but who's doing evil?
> Well, it could be anyone. That is the point.
> And what is this Bobby Q business?
> Branding! You're going to love it. Ok, so without further ado may
I present your future high school president, Mr. Bobby Q.
Put on the hat. Ok, now say the tagline.
> I will Bobby-Q my opponents to the gates of hell.
> Can I talk to you privately for a moment?
> Yeah. Isn't he great?
> This is not Bobby?
> Look, Wendy just wants Bobby to de-emphasize a few things, you know,
> Cousin Tariq is not going to like this.
> Ah, you didn't invite him did you?
> You better believe she did.
> Oh, hi cousin Tariq. Also known as Black Thought from The Roots.
> Aasif, what is all this?
> This is branding.
> Man you really done it this time.
Look Bobby, becoming a successful public figure isn't about changing who you are.
> No, I know that, but Wendy said if I read this speech promising to protect
the school from Sharia law then I'm a shoo-in.
> Who's implementing Sharia law at a high school?
> Well no one, but a vote for Bobby ensures it will stay that way.
> Lady, do you even know what Sharia law is?
> Ok, here's the thing, I don't, but I do know that it tests through the roof
if you say you're against it.
> Listen lady, I don't have time to teach you that Sharia law is a
broadly defined set of religious practices, and that it could never
become law in America because the U.S. Constitution supersedes all religious law.
> See, I feel like you did have time to actually teach me that.
> But I will tell you that people like you throw around these so called scary
Muslim terms like Sharia to convince everyone that we're some kind of bogeyman,
and that's not cool.
> Wow, this has been a very special episode,
> Look man, just speak your mind. You know, I mean like, why do you really
want to lead your class?
> Ok, here goes. I'm running for class president so that students of
all backgrounds can rally around what's really important, and what's most
important is that girls swim team practices should be open to the
public just like all the other team practices are.
> That's your platform?
> That's my boy.
> Woo, yeah!
(They chant): U.S.A, U.S.A,...
> Oh, Aasif.
> I want a divorce.
(end theme song plays)
> Are you trying to win by boring everyone to death so no one can vote
for anyone else?
> Whitney Habib...oh, shit.
> No-no, if you want to win at a campaign sometimes you got...
Look, if you want to be a winner you sometimes have to...shit.
> Put on the hat. Ok...oops. Nope, sorry. It went on backwards.
> Sharia law is a broadly defined set of religious practices.
> Wendy she said if I read this speech promising to protect...there's no speech
> Yeah, I'm an idiot.
(male voice): And cutting.