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January 03, 2017

I think I speak for everybody when I say this: 2016 stunk!

2016 was a rough year if you’re a celebrity. It was an even rougher year if you’re a fan of celebrities. We lost so many icons: Alan Rickman, Prince, David Bowie, Elie Wiesel, Mohamed Ali, Gary Marshall, Harambe, Gene Wilder, Leonard Cohen, George Michael, Carrie Fisher, Debbie Reynolds and many more. May they all Rest in Peace.

You never knew who could be next! It’s like 2016 was George R. R. Martin; if you got too attached to a character/celebrity, they were sure to die this season. I think we can all agree that 2016 can piss off. Am I right?!

And what’s up with those election results? Thanks again, 2016!

And what about sports?? The calendrical year of 2016 was also responsible for some bad events transpiring for the New England Patriots. In 2015, the Pats won the Superbowl. Thank you, 2015, you angel! But the Patties didn’t even make it past the playoffs in 2016. What the heck, 2016?! Obviously, this terrible year had a personal vendetta against Tom Brady smdh.

These last twelve months were also out to get my iPhone. The poor thing fell in the toilet three times this past year! It’s like the four numbers 2, 0, 1, and 6 got together, said “Screw you!” personally to my phone, and made me accidentally drop it in the toilet three times.

2016 was also harsh on my face. I won’t get into the gross details, but let me just put it this way: I got a lot of zits! At a certain point, you just have to ask yourself, what is up with these 366 consecutive days?!

Sure, bad things can still happen at any time, but I’m just glad 2016 is over. And when the next bad thing happens, we’ll just have to find some other abstraction to blame.